What a crazy night!

Went out with the Husband last night and we had a blast drinking and hanging out together. We ended up making friends with a short little firecracker of a girl and two of the cooks that work at this friendly neighborhood bar and grill. The girl was a trip for sure, I mean she came to this bar alone and ordered one beer then asked if she could join our table and we were a little tipsy at this point so we're like sure why not? Well here's why not...she was a bar fly using people to buy her drinks. So okay whatever she was clever and cute and wanted to get free drinks, I'm really more frustrated that we were dumb enough to buy her at least two rounds! Out of all of this information the kicker for me was that she was a wealth of useless information and she just kept rambling about crap to make herself seem interesting or smart when really she just made herself more annoying. All in all we met a cool guy and brought him back to the house to party so the night was good. I woke up this morning a little mortified that not only did I listen and converse with this annoying ass girl for way to long I had a pretty much complete stranger sleeping on my couch! Even though the stranger turned out to be a good, normal guy it is a little funny that when I went to leave my room this afternoon (yes I slept until 1 p.m.) I had to move the dresser out of the way because last night in my drunken stupor I moved the dresser in front of our bedroom door in case our new friend turned out to be a psycho killer. Ahhh the joys of drinking.

Grrrr

I'm a little grouchy today thanks to a certain monthly friend visiting me as well as this ridiculous cabbage soup diet I'm forcing myself to do. I'm searching hi and low to find patience but let me tell you, it's hard! Anyways, went to Wal-mart today and saw a girl from high school and she definitely saw me and made eye contact then just looked away. It always perplexes me when I see people I know and they act like they don't see you. I know for a fact I've done nothing to offend her and although I'm almost certain it was more of a "I don't wanna make small talk" kind of dismissal I'm still sitting here wondering why she didn't say hi. Oh well, this is probably another thing I need to not read into.

Already slipping up!

So day three here and I've already become a slacker with my New Years resolution to blog daily. It's been a good day. I've been the laziest person alive over the last three days compliments of my New Year's eve hangover. Tired of struggling with my weight I've turned to a fad diet known as the "Cabbage soup diet" where I eat nothing but fruits/vegetables and cabbage soup. Supposedly I am going to lose 10-15 lbs. in 7 days...we'll see (sigh). I know mostly everyone struggles with their weight or appearance throughout their lives but I'm seriously disappointed in myself, I've gained 60 lbs. since I've graduated high school. I think it's safe to say I've exceeded the freshman fifteen! Granted, I squeezed out a kid...four years ago...I only gained 32 lbs during my pregnancy so the ugly truth is I let myself gain another 30 on top of that and I've done nothing to lose it. I have the usually dilemmas with losing weight; I love food, hate working out, and stress eat like theirs no tomorrow. So, I'm going to do this diet for a week and it will hopefully help me shrink my stomach a little and then next week I'm gonna start making these yummy protein shakes and substituting them for breakfast and lunch. My goal: lose 50lbs before 2012. I'm excited and motivated but both of those things fade away quickly with boredom and lack of will power so I'm gonna pray a lot and try to hang in there!

Shit

Well I just made a pathetic attempt at my first blog post and managed to fuck it up by accidentally deleting it before I posted it. Well here it is my New Year's resolution for 2011, I'm going to start a blog and get my twisted inner thoughts out for all to see. I guess I hope for this to be therapeutic for me you know, letting others give me their unbiased opinions on my life rather than talking with my friends or family. As my blog title states I'm usually uncertain about most things in my life but no one really knows it because I just keep this inner struggle a secret to appear "together". I haven't told anyone that I'm doing this because I'm worried about what they will think if they read it, wow I didn't realize how lame I was until I wrote that. Yep, that's me the people pleaser always worried about what everyone will think and constantly trying to be their idea of a better person. In all honesty I think I'm a damn good person but then why do I care so much about what everyone else thinks?